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Hitch: Life is not the amount of breaths you take, it's the moments that take your breath away.
Hitch: Always remember, life is not how many breaths you take, it's how many moments take your breath away.
Hitch: "Coquille St. Jacques." Death on a leaf!
Sara: What should we toast to?
Hitch: Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away.
Hitch: Any guy can sweep any girl off her feet, he just needs the right broom.
Vance: [after telling Hitch that he only wants a girl so he can sleep with her] No, I was told that you help guys get in there.
Hitch: Right, but see, here's the thing - my clients actually *like* women. "Hit it and quit it" is not my thing.
Vance: Let me make one thing clear to you, rabbi, I need professional help.
Hitch: Well, *that* is for damn certain.
Vance: [grabs Hitch by the wrist] You see what I'm doing? This is what I'm about - power suit, power tie, power steering. People can wince, cry, beg, but eventually they do what I want.
Hitch: Oh! So that's, like, a metaphor?
Vance: Oh, yeah.
Hitch: Right. Well, see, I'm more of a literal kind of guy. So when I do this...
[he reverses the grip, twists Vance's arm back and slams him on the table]
Hitch: This is more like me saying that I will literally *break your shit off* if you ever touch me again. Okay, pumpkin?
Sara: So, you kinda like me, huh?
Hitch: No. I love you.
Hitch: So how does it happen, great love? Nobody knows... but what I can tell you is that it happens in the blink of an eye. One moment you're enjoying your life, and the next you're wondering how you ever lived without them.
Hitch: Lean in, place your hand on the small of her back, say it in her ear like a secret. But watch your hand placement, too high says, 'I just wanna be friends,' too low says, 'I just wanna grab some ass.'
Albert: [making holding gestures at different levels] Okay... Friends. Ass. Me.
Hitch: Because that's what people do. They leap, and hope to God they can fly, because otherwise you just drop like a rock, wondering the whole way down, why in the *hell* did I jump? But here I am, Sarah, falling, and the only one that makes me feel like I can fly... is you.
[last lines]
Hitch: Basic principles... there are none.
Albert: You know what it's like getting up every morning? Feeling hopeless, feeling like the love of your life is waking up with the wrong man. But, at the same time hoping that she still finds happiness, even if it's never going to be with you.
Hitch: [in reference to the seafood appetizer] Coquille St-Jacques, my ass! Death on a leaf!
[Unimpressed with Albert's dance moves, Hitch pauses the music and slaps him across the face]
Hitch: Get out.
Hitch: Like I always tell my clients - begin each day as if it were on purpose.
Sara: Oh, God. You're a morning person, aren't you?
Hitch: Well, you know, like I always tell my clients, "Begin each day as if it were on purpose."
Hitch: Now, on the one hand, it is very difficult for a man to even speak to someone who looks like you. But, on the other hand, should that be your problem?
Sara: So life's kind of hard all around.
Hitch: Not if you pay attention. I mean, you're sending all the right signals - no earrings, heels under two inches, your hair is pulled back, you're wearing reading glasses with no book, drinking a Grey Goose martini, which means you had a hell of a week and a beer just wouldn't do it. And if that wasn't clear enough, there's always the "fuck off" sign that you have stamped on your forehead.
[Albert is holding a box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts]
Hitch: What you got there?
Albert: This? I figured maybe if my heart stops beating, it wouldn't hurt so much.
Hitch: I'm a guy. Since when do we get anything right the first time?
The invention of basketball was not an accident. It was developed to meet a need. Those boys simply would not play "Drop the Handkerchief."
Dr James Naismith (creator of basketball)
The first time I shot the hook, I was in fourth grade, and I was about five feet eight inches tall. I put the ball up and felt totally at ease with the shot. I was completely confident it would go in. I've been shooting it ever since.
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
I try to do the right thing at the right time. They may just be little things, but usually they make the difference between winning and losing.
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
One man can be a crucial ingredient on a team, but one man cannot make a team.
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
What is so fascinating about sitting around watching a bunch of pituitary cases stuff a ball through a hoop (in "Annie Hall")
Woody Allen
I don't believe professional athletes should be role models. I believe parents should be role models...
Charles Barkley
The backboard is your friend.
Basketball doesn't build character. It reveals it.
If you think small things don't matter, think of the last game you lost by one point.
It is not how big you are, it is how big you play.
In our court there are no objections...Only rejections! Block it!
On any given night, anyone can be anyone.
The harder you fall down, the higher you will bounce back up
The hoop is open, the net is hot! Make that shot!
My responsibility is getting all my players playing for the name on the front of the jersey, not the one on the back
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take! Shoot the hoop!
If I weren't earning $3 million a year to dunk a basketball, most people on the street would run in the other direction
if they saw me coming
People say I enjoy being famous. I don't. But what choice do I have?
Charles Barkley
These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me,
they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it!
Charles Barkley (In a commercial for basketball shoes)
Basketball is like photography, if you don't focus, all you have is the negative
Dan Frisby
If you meet the Buddha in the lane, feed him the ball.
Phil Jackson
"I learned to give him the ball"....
(Magic Johnson's answer when he was asked about what he learned about the game of basketball by playing with Kareem Abdul-Jabbar)
You don't play against opponents. You play against the game of basketball.
Bobby Knight
Sometimes a player's greatest challenge is coming to grips with his role on the team.
Scottie Pippen
I look at the NBA as a football game without the helmet.
Tom Tolbert
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